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9.9.01

Much unplanned weirdness tonight.

I returned home from the University Church Deacons and Stewards meeting around 9 and began to do the dishes. Dave came into the kitchen and told me to wash the frying pan with feeling. He selected "remorse" as the feeling I should use. Then he told me that the fact that I had a paper that said "ABRAHAM" taped to my chest was one of the weirdest things he'd ever seen. I explained that we had done this icebreaker where everyone has the name of a famous Bible person on their back, and you have to find out who your person is by asking yes/no questions. You could move it around to the front once you guessed. I confused Elisha because I had narrowed mine down to a man in Genesis, so I asked "Did he live before Abraham?" She answered, "well ... during." Dave said that was even weirder.

My facial expression during this conversation deeply frightened Dave, because he said it was exactly the kind of expression Amanda would make. He started backing away from me, holding his fingers like a cross and saying "avert your eyes! He may change forms!"

I discussed the issue with Mikey and April-Lyn, and we came to the conclusion that, while April-Lyn was Amanda's twin and Kate-o was Amanda's clone, I must be Amanda's doppleganger.

I then discussed the issue with Marty. He expressed concern that there was a turning-into-Amanda epidemic on the loose. We decided we may have to quarrantine all infected persons. We would need to be especially careful because one of Amandaa's roommates is little Moon-Pie. The consequences of combining the Amanda Virus with the Wolyniak budding capability could be disastrous. Then we would have to create an Amanda serum (extract of Amanda, if you will) to use as a vaccine.

So I went up to the fifth floor of East to deliver the Whitlams CD I had earlier promised to loan to Amanda and Maggie, who I have corrupted into Whitlams fans (which only reinforces Maggie's reported obsession with going to Australia). Shortly after I arrived, half a dozen people arrived to watch The Emperor's New Groove. I had no choice but to stay and endure its Disney-ness. In its defense, I can say that it made no attempt to inject a romantic subplot -- quite a feat in a movie of the non-messed-up persuasion. It was very frightening being in a dark room with six people who were not only reciting lines from the movie, but also imitating the characters' hand motions. And I learned that Amanda had been feeding me ENG lines all day, as every other word out of their mouths made me think "hey, Amanda said that today!"

Amanda and Maggie continued to hold me hostage after the movie ended and the others departed. They offered to let Marty ransom me for $20, but he decided he'd rather have a single. Then they decided to let me buy my freedom by helping to re-hang the tapestry in their stairwell. Amanda wound up doing most of the work, as getting up to the tapestry involved standing on the plaque that has their room number beside the door. I just fetched adhesive.

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