112 Reasons to Lead a Barren, Childless Existence That Ends in Your Death 60. You know how when you were a kid, there were some other kids in your peer group you didn't like, who were annoying? 61. What if, as your child gets older, you start to think he's annoying?! 62. It's not like you can send her back. 63. Or give her up for adoption to some annoying family. 64. And because the kid is in many respects just an amplifier for all of your own attributes, including the less-attractive ones, then you have to ask yourself, "Am I annoying?" 65. Your friends' kids might be cooler than yours and make you jealous that you didn't end up with the kick-ass kids.

Now I'm even more convinced I don't want offspring. I think sea turtles are more highly evolved than us -- they can just lay their eggs and leave them.